plans for my future

talked to my captain today. he told me that from all the emails he has recieved regarding my board that things are not looking promising as far as staying in. because they beleive that i am not stable enough to handle deployment conditions and will need constant medical care for the rest of my life to remain stable than the military lifestlye is not for me.

basically, the air force has become a very strong deployment force. ergo, i can't deploy, they have no space for me. make room for someone who can deploy out.

there are no guarentees at this point, but its looking no so good for me. but the plus side, if it is truly deemed as a non- pre-existing condition, i could be medicdally retired and get all benefits, to include medical and pay.

so have started my list to plan for a mid-late august/early september seperation
1) clean apartment and have maintenance fix all leaky faucets, mold, blinds and whatnot
2) figure out what furniture can be downsized and sold. mainly the leather couch and chair, extra desks, futon frame and things along those lines. buy used furniture and set aside leftover money
3) talk to bro mullet about staying in teh church trailer park for a bit while we get back on our feet after i get out.
4) put together a resume and start job searching.
5) rob is talking to an army recuiter, so we may not lose any benefits after all if he decides to enlist.

and of course, pray...

i know whatever the decision is what God wants. i am already looking forward to being able to work more in the church while at ALS... maybe it will become a more permanent thing...

am trying really hard not to stress, but its hard not to. rob is talking to mike about helping us out more as far as bills go. basically i have put my foot down. mike either pays 1/3 of the average rent and bills and helps out as far as cleaning and groceries or he finds somewhere else to live. i am NOT going to support him if i dont have to. he works, he has money. he can poney up his share. that was the WHOLE purpose of having a roomie. this will also reduce about 80% of the arguments between me and rob. i like the sound of that.

thats really it. this stuff is going to come down quick once i get my results. and should they, for some reason, decided to keep me...

i will be moving by next march.

either way, my life is about to change big time. and i really belive that i should start prepping for life as a civilian.

one big plus to that... no more weight standards. i can lose and gain to my hearts content !!!! makes it much less stressful on me. dont get me wrong, i would LOVE to weigh less, but i hate that i HAVE to. i am happy being plus sized. i'm healthy and can run almost two miles easily. why do i have to look like barbie???

okay, seriously gotta run now.

Tchuss!